When will it happen?
How much will it cost?
How strong will it be with less processing power?
What new features will become available with its playing level?
Will we finally have a CrazyStone-like review feature on Linux?
Will it root your phone, uninstall Facebook, and take control of your auxiliary brain?

So many questions, and just a thread for (a few) answers and (a lot of) discussion.

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La victoire est un hasard, la défaite une nécessité.

For me, this is the interesting query. A web service where a decent amateur player could get that kind of game review, on a pizza delivery sort of timescale, would undoubtedly do a great deal for go, worldwide. Particularly middlegame analysis, based on pro-level timing and perception.

A big ask as a free service, but not perhaps an enormous one, if DeepMind have an interest in continuing the project indefinitely.

Why does it have to be a web service?

I had a paying offline service in mind, althought anything would be fine, really.
(If Google wants to collect my kifu, it's not like they need me to do so)

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La victoire est un hasard, la défaite une nécessité.

I didn't say it had to be. Take this as a suggestion. Indeed, what would Google know about web services? No, wait ...