Catching Scent of Victory (Strategy 5), O Rissei 9d wrote:
Although in this position it may be considered natural and inevitable, Cho Honinbo always looks for the best move and goes to great pains to do so. Seeing him figure as what might be called a seeker of truth, one is deeply impressed.
Playing 
instantly or playing as in the actual game is the very same thing on the board, but in terms of content, there is a world of difference.
Move Content
Looking back over the post-game commentary in a few of the games I've played here, I see that I'm sometimes distressed that I didn't read more carefully during the game. I played something silly and without thought. Considering how long I've played this game, that I've done go problems in the past, and that I've seen a lot of tesujis, there is really no reason for me not to...
play better. Yes, I could study more, and yes I could try to learn more. But when I'm playing a game, I play a lot of slack - and I should care more.
I've always liked the quote by O Rissei 9d, given above. I don't remember what
was at all, and to me, it wasn't the point. The point struck me in the last sentence - the move was the same move on the board, but in terms of
content, there was a
world of difference.
So what is this "content" that exists in moves? What gives a move content, and what makes a move... empty? The answer - that which makes a "world of difference" in one's play - must lie in the essence of being a seeker of truth. It must be found not on the board where
never changes. The answer must be found outside of the board... And I guess, within myself. My plan and my strategy behind my moves... That is what gives a move content. Not the fact that I played
, and not the fact that I incidentally captured my opponent and won the game without having had any premonition of the event.
So I want to discover what this "world of difference" is. I want to experience the feeling of living on the other side. And I want to play that way in my games.
Today's Game
With these thoughts in mind, I began a game today. Faced with the empty board, I said to myself that I wanted to play a game that was meaningful. I wanted to play on the side that makes, as O Rissei 9d stated, a "world of difference". And did I experience it?
No, I don't think that I did. But I think that I was a little bit closer than usual. There are at least three distinct parts of the game where I remember feeling that I didn't really want to read what would happen, but I read the situation out, made a plan, and acted accordingly. But that was for only three board positions of the 218 moves we played.
So I cannot call myself a "seeker of truth", yet. I haven't experienced the "world of difference". But, again, I think I'm a little bit closer. Perhaps I am a "seeker of the essence of seeking for truth". Or perhaps, I'm simply still a tad too lazy.
Time Management
I also learned today that it is exceedingly difficult to be a "seeker of truth" in the limited time I have to play the game. I play games ranging from blitz to around 30 minutes a game (plus byo-yomi). Given a conservative estimate of a 200 move game, that's about 9 seconds per move (without byo-yomi). In reality, I only play half of those moves, and byo-yomi accounts for a lot. But the point remains that I have to make important decisions - difficult ones for a seeker of truth - in a very short amount of time.
So I am starting to believe that it is important to use each second in a game without waste. How can the "truth be sought" with these time constraints? I suppose it can only be sought by trying one's very best within the time that is allotted.
here is too easy on Black and doesn't focus on the corner appropriately. Black has a good followup at A or B here; then the corner is open at C or G; and after White D Black still can reduce the area with moves such as E/F so White won't gain enough in this area.
exchange, above, benefit black?
. This trade of the upper left for the upper right would leave White well positioned. The initial 
is easier to play. The stone at 
May I suggest, following Jowa's advice, that you take time around move 100 to assess the position and plan your play?