Thank you Ed and Bill for the comments.
The good news is that I *did* consider most of the moves you suggest. The bad thing is that I decided against them... which suggests that there might be something flawed in my positional / tactical judgment.
Just not to divert too much, I'll take two examples:
@Ed:
About the "slow"

. Invading top right corner was the other option. Thought if I do, black will chose a joseki that builds a wall vertically and gives him sente (at the cost of a few points in the corner), then that sente move can be used to further his grip on the whole top side of the board.
So my

at H16 was intended as claiming some territory, setting up the double wing and preparing to invade top right.
What is wrong with that reasoning? (Note: I am not arguing there is nothing wrong with my thinking, just trying to find out where I think wrong and why)
@Bill:
About

, the other move I considered were indeed D2 (or maybe D3). Decided against them because of something like this:
$$W
$$ | . . . . . . . . .
$$ | . . X . . . . . .
$$ | . . . . . . . . .
$$ | . 5 O . . . . . .
$$ | . 4 6 7 . . . . .
$$ | . . . O . . . . X
$$ | . . 2 3 . X . . .
$$ | . . 8 1 . . . . .
$$ | . . . . . . . . .
$$ ------------------
- Click Here To Show Diagram Code
[go]$$W
$$ | . . . . . . . . .
$$ | . . X . . . . . .
$$ | . . . . . . . . .
$$ | . 5 O . . . . . .
$$ | . 4 6 7 . . . . .
$$ | . . . O . . . . X
$$ | . . 2 3 . X . . .
$$ | . . 8 1 . . . . .
$$ | . . . . . . . . .
$$ ------------------[/go]
and whites stones look in danger to me (no eyes!). Objectively they might be ok, but when I am on the run for my life, that ends up too often with me getting a 20+ stone group captured. So I *really* try to avoid being on the run.
The pincer was partially to weaken the C8 stone and give my stones in the corner some assistance if the line above happens.
Maybe there is a better way to deal with that 3-3 invasion, but I tend to lose corners to opponents tossing in stones like that. (See how I lost the whole top left corner move :b255: the game).
Same reasoning about being on the run applies to Ed's suggestion about

to be played at F4 (actually F5 was what I considered, but same idea). Thought I end up running - allowing black to harass me, and securing a lot of points in the process - best case. In the worst case my opponents also catches the group and wins the game right there.
Is this the wrong way of thinking? It was a rapid online game, so there is no time to read more than 2-3 moves.